“Those who cannot conceive of friendship as a substantive love but only as a disguise or elaboration of Eros betray the fact that they have never had a friend.” – C.S. Lewis
Contemporary media and culture does not seem to understand friendship, which is a tragedy beyond measure. A true friend is worth more than refined platinum. There was the friend who picked me up in another state, the friend who prayed with me after I snapped and lost control of myself, the friend who asked me to be his best man, the friend I talked down from the brink of suicide, the friend I trained and hired for my job, the friend who taught me how to shoot, the friend who I introduced to his future wife. All of these are men I care about and respect – my bros. There are also close friends I have that are ladies whom I am not romantically involved with at all. These are co-workers and old college friends, one of whom is like an adopted younger sister. The idea that having a close friend actually means a desire to screw them is utterly disgusting to me, but society seems to aim that way.
Youtuber and dedicated Tolkien fan Just Some Guy takes on this trend in fine fashion:
https://www.bitchute.com/video/hgJR7mFQTHnG/ (some non-CoC language)
There’s something sad in this. Could you imagine growing up without any good friends, where the the only love you receive is in exchange for sex? Perhaps there is some Freudian psychology or similar theory behind this, but it seems to go deeper. Sometimes I look at the social justice crowd, and see a horde of broken people looking to make everything as messed up as they are.
Just Some Guy makes another point in his video, one that goes along with the discussion above. Media and stories do not have to be about you or people like you for you to understand them and enjoy them. They can expand your worldview and show you another perspective on life. Tolkien writes in a mythic way, not like contemporary authors even from back then. Reading the Lord of the Rings as a child was a challenge, but well worth the effort. It took me to another world, with different perspectives. If a technology-revering geek could appreciate the perspective of a tree-loving ruralist, perhaps these social justice types could imagine a world where you could have loyal platonic friendships, even with people you had deep-seated grudges against.
The problem is that such a story is does not provide validation. If enough cool people in stories are like me, maybe then I won’t be an outsider. However, stories are not necessarily written to validate your worldview or life. Changing a story to suit you is like painting on another artist’s canvas – perhaps it is fun to do in your imagination, but doing on the real thing is an insult to the creator of the work and mocks anyone with a different interpretation of the work.
Perhaps, if people cannot find validation in themselves, they should look to their friends.
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